Friday, December 7, 2012

HOME for Christmas!!!!

I love this song.  I played it the last two Christmases (amidst our adoption process) while begging and pleading with God to shower our children with His love, provision and protection.  Last Christmas, knowing both boys were OUR SON.........and would still not yet be home.

I listened to this song again this morning (thanks for the FB tag, Jenny!).  Tears immediately strolled down my face as I easily felt again the pangs of the deep ache and longing for our boys to be HOME with us last Christmas ~ knowing that they would continue to be half a world away from us.

"It's Christmastime again, but you're not home.  Your family is here andyet you're somewhere else alone.  So tonight I pray that God will come, and hold you in His arms, and tell you from my heart, I wish you a Merry Christmas."

My heart is so FULL and so GRATEFUL that THIS Christmastime our story is different!!!  

Both boys are HOME and in our arms!!!  Rejoicing WITH US in the birth of our Lord and Saviour!!!!  Decorating the tree WITH US (well, K is more like "un-decorating but we love it)!!!  Singing Christmas carols WITH US!!!  And cuddling on the couch WITH US while watching Christmas shows and movies!!!

This song still makes me cry.  The memory of the emptiness these past two Christmases is daunting.  The deep ache in my heart will never be forgotten.  But neither will God's grace in how beautifully He nurtured our sons in our absence.

Even so, the painful memories of wondering if our boys felt our love and God's love ~ or if they felt alone ~ cannot steal away the EXUBERANCE I am experiencing this year having them HOME in our arms!!!!!

"It's Christmastime again and now you're home.  Your family is here, so you will never be alone.  So tonight before you go to sleep, I'll hold you in my arms and tell you from my heart, I wish you a Merry Christmas."


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